You are surprised and excited at the same time. After spending months on an internet-dating website, you met some amazing people, along with a few that you were not too sure about. After talking to a few select people that were a little more special than others, you finally met someone special – someone you really want to meet – someone with potential.
You both felt the attraction almost immediately. The conversations were interesting and always filled with surprises. It was as though every time you missed chatting for one day, you felt something missing. This was the time when you realized that this was not just any ordinary meeting but one destined for success.
Everything about this situation is perfect – well almost. The only problem is that the person you have fallen for lives 500 miles from where you live. The drive is too far, the airline flight too expensive, and now the two of you are trying to figure out what to do. After all, this person is the one that has captured your heart – the person you want to meet and have been longing to get to know.
If this sounds all too familiar, you are certainly not alone. When it comes to online dating, this one scenario plays out time and again. Therefore, you need to be realistic about what your budget will support. That does not mean you should limit your possibilities of meeting someone living elsewhere, just that there could be more obstacles to cross if you do.
If this individual is truly someone that special, then try to make a minimum of one in-person trip, and more if possible. Additionally, it is important that you commit yourselves to daily phone conversations.
After meeting, if you both agree that this relationship is one worth pursuing, you will need to make sure the communication lines are wide open until the time for one of you to move. Keep in mind that although fun and exciting, this time is also very stressful, which is perfectly normal. You might also feel a sense of overwhelming insecurity, which is also normal.
Because these emotions will pop up, it is important that when you receive a message from the other person, you respond immediately. This will provide much needed confirmation that he or she is just as committed as you are. As you prepare to make your move, you can keep romance alive, even long-distance.
While some people may think this is strange, others who have tried it will tell you that it works. Set phone dates that consists of each person making dinner, sitting down with candlelight and wine, and then talking over the phone during dinner. This is an excellent way to set special time aside in a relaxed setting, as you prepare for the real one-on-one romantic dinner.
During this separation, try to stay focused on the new adventure that lies ahead of you and not the changes that you are currently going through. Falling in love is a wonderful thing and your time apart is only temporary. Make sure that each time you say your goodbyes, whether on the phone or via e-mail, again provide confirmation and support. You need to let each other know that you truly are in love and are committed to this new walk in life.
Most importantly, you have to trust each other while these changes are occurring. In addition to changing jobs, selling or moving from a home, saying goodbye to family and friends, there is also the dread of being apart from the person you love and want to spend the rest of your life with so trust must be a huge piece of the transition.